Frustrated with self

I lived with a girl who cleaned all the time.  And when she wasn’t cleaning she was at school.  And when she wasn’t at school she was at work.  And when she wasn’t at work and wasn’t cleaning she was gardening, painting, planning the next thing.  Always moving, always looking for the next thing.  And when I lived with her, I tried to stay away from the dust she stirred up.  I had never been more fit, because while she was running around the house I was running as far away as I could and then back again.  Like a yo-yo.

And I wondered if she could ever sit still, and just be alone with herself.  So I promised myself I wouldn’t be like that, constantly in motion.

And in Louisiana I just wanted to leave the humidity.  In college I just wanted to leave the madness.  In Florida I wanted to leave the ignorance.  And when I moved to Cali I wanted to hurry up and settle – hence buying the big expensive dining table because that’s a sure sign that your relationship is going to last forever.

I like my table.  I’m glad I bought it and I’m glad I managed to get it into my 429 sq ft of space.  And I’m going to sit here by myself, because I can’t be bothered with distractions.

Except the no food in the apartment distraction.


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