about who I once wanted to be

I had this image of who I wanted to be.  A strong, authoritative, confident woman, the one who maintained a feminine nature, who didn’t feel the need to assert herself by wearing power suits or by sitting in and bearing my breast as indiscreetly as possible to make a point about breastfeeding being beautiful.  I want to be a mother and a career woman and also have my hobbies which include sewing, gardening, and painting.  I also want to help women with decisions about health issues, I want to make sure women know their options and are educated before making these decisions.  I think women, as a whole, are a powerful force in helping each-other become the women we want to be and women are a powerful force in society.  And I think some women have taken a wrong turn.  And I wouldn’t be blogging about some women because it would only be considering an isolated portion and there are plenty examples of groups that aren’t doing this.  But I’m writing about these women because they are getting too much attention, too much credit, and I don’t want them to represent me. 

I think women have found a new source of liberation through blogging.  And that’s great.  I think this is a great platform to use for many good things – news/opinion, ideas, sharing, connecting, venting, whatever you can think of.  And now companies and marketers have jumped on it and are targeting this platform.  Which is also great, it’s tapping into niche audiences like never before and it offers marketers a direct line to their customer, something that often gets lost.  But in terms of a representative community, mommy blogs are taking over the tubes.  And I wish I could say that’s a good thing, but I think the community has succumbed to popular girl syndrome.  What started as a community for networking and finding resources has exploded into a conglomerate of mommyblogger+insert here (journalist, crazy cocktail queen, political junkie, craft-guru, posh net-worker….)  And it’s a marketing magnet.  Companies have jumped on this community and schmoozed it into a sense of entitlement.  Just follow mommybloggers on twitter and you’ll see how quick some are to jump onto mistakes marketers make when gearing offers to this community.  In the end, I think it’s harmful to other mommybloggers trying to establish themselves without being so quick to the draw on bashing the first company that does the wrong thing, the company that doesn’t have a woman speaker at the conference, or the political rally that under-represents mothers.

And while this is seemingly geared to mommybloggers, it’s not.  It’s also about women in the corporate world, the higher-ups, the decision makers.  The sense of entitlement reveals itself in business deals.  While sweet in the beginning, I’ve been bitten in the ass by passive-aggressive women using others to deliver messages so that the head can keep smiling to the public.  This isn’t the case everywhere, it’s just a disappointment to me when a stereotype proves true.  I want to believe more in humanity, people, and women.  I like having mentors and heroes, I think it’s important to have these people throughout life.  But as a twenty-something, I’ve been disappointed as of late by the women around me.  And as a blogger, albeit just a personal blogger, it’s important to find these mentors and heroes in the blogging world.  That sense of entitlement translates down to people just entering the blogosphere.  I met a girl just barely out of college at a conference last year and her sense of entitlement shat all over me.  She was trying to dig for information on my boss and I pointed her in the direction of my boss and she snipped, completely shoved her face up near mine and noted how I was not helping her at all.  I passed this information to my boss, and you know, my boss pays attention to how not only the managers are treated, but the coordinators and assistants as well.  The entitlement attitude in the women blogosphere is contagious, and I don’t think it’s going in a direction I want to go.

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1 Comment

Filed under Life

One response to “about who I once wanted to be

  1. That’s a great one, i really like your thoughts on this one. Truly, how often we miss out on little things, but always dream about great things.

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