coming to terms

I’ll never be that optimistic girl you knew from high school.  And of all my faulty weaknesses, I think this is the one I may never come to terms with.  I even asked boy if he could ever see me that way, the optimist, the smile that walks into the room, the ball of energy that breaks the quotidian.  His response – “well, you’ll never be mistaken for that person.”  But maybe I want to be mistaken for that person.

Some day I want to write a book.  Does everyone have that dream?  I like to think that everyone does.

Maybe we’ll have a holiday party.  An upbeat party where I can finally wear that black dress I love so much with the black slipper flats.  But what if people don’t come?

I want to be a die hard fan of something.  Sports, literature, Twilight…  But I haven’t found what I want to be a fan of yet.

I love the word quotidian.  It sounds like it should be boring when it’s anything but.

I bought nail polish because the name was seasonal – plum pudding.  It screamed “wear me during Thanksgiving dinner and everything will taste that much sweeter!”  And now that dinner is over, I feel like a whore.

I have a closet turned study room.  It has a window and a desk.  My thinking space.  It’s meant to keep all distractions away, including Jack and Jack’s tongue which he can’t seem to keep in his mouth.  He licks air.  I think I may be getting a bit lonely sitting here in my thinking closet…

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2 Comments

Filed under Life

2 responses to “coming to terms

  1. I think I’m more optimistic and happy now than I used to be. I’ll never be the “always on,” hyper-sparkly personality either…but I’m better.

    I’m totally feeling you on the whole “If I have a party, will anyone come?” thing.

  2. …why ‘someday’? Do it now.

    Go on, throw that party…

    “…he walks into a party, like he walks onto a yacht…”

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